I was at the doctor’s office this morning, well no, it’s not an office– it’s a clinic. Because I’m pretty poor and on NY State Medicaid. But I’m there, an hour ago. In the little waiting room area, the place you go after the nurse takes your vitals but before you actually see the doctor? Yes, I was in that room.
Couple of other people in there. One of which, let’s call her “Barbara” because I don’t know or care about her real name, is obviously someone who used to work there… unless there’s some other reason everybody’s talking to her like an old friend. I read about a kid who had Ebola Virus like 5 times in 3 years, maybe she’s a freak like that and has just been to this clinic thousands of times? who knows.
Anyway. This one nurse, I call him “Stoney Dude” because he’s one of those Long Island guidos who spends all his time lifting weights and drinking redbull and smoking cheap mexican import weed. Stoney Dude walks by and says, “Hey Barbara. How you doin? Ya hangin’ in there?”
Barbara’s response is, naturally, “I’m okay. But I’d be better if I had a gun and a bullet.” One of my eyebrows jumped up at this peculiar answer.
Stoney Dude said in reply, “You and me both, babe. You and me both.”
This is, I assume (and/or vaguely remember), the Long Island way of bonding in passing. Comiserating is popular here. It’s small talk to these people. I, on the other hand, was sitting there smirking at the thought of what it would be like if these two actually killed themselves in this little room. Other than my having to wipe blood out of my eyes, I think this would be pretty hilarious. I like when douchebags kill themselves.
But. Here’s my fucking gripe. If a seemingly happy-go-lucky nurse at the clinic is thinking about suicide as a viable option… then how is that supposed to make the rest of us (the patients, the sick folks, the people with real problems) feel? I just thought this quick exchange of words between these two was highly irresponsible. You don’t make small talk about death at a clinic for poor people.
In other news, The Nutty Professor (Dr Touchyballs) said my liver is doing WAY WAY better, and I’m on my way to being a healthy human being. Woot!