I was bored. So I started counting. I found 216 grey hairs on top of my head. And I discovered 67 grey hairs in my beard. I used to laugh at how corny it sounded when I’d hear a middle-aged woman say, “someone checked my ID when I went to buy cigarettes today, I felt so grateful to be confused with a teenager! (cue middle-aged-lady cackle)” but now… Now I get it. Someone asked for my ID in a bar the other night, and I felt fantastic about it.
I’ve already realised that I have a lot of womanly qualities. Yes, yes, I did indeed cry at the end of 13 Going On 30. But now, yeah, I’m starting to wonder if I’m going to start losing my shit about aging. I’ll be 30 in approximately… 505 days, 22 hours, and 20 minutes. I used to think I was excited about approaching thirty, but I’m not so sure anymore. Am I going to start lying about my age? Am I going buy skin creams that take away 7 years worth of wrinkles? I can’t even see any wrinkles yet. I mean, my eyes look old, but I think they’ve always done that.
I also used to say (or agree with that d-bag that first said) “Anyone over the age of thirty is the fucking enemy.” And now my grey hairs are telling me to repent and change my ways.
How do people my age (especially men who never really did a good job of growing up) feel about getting older? And approaching age 30? And still not having any idea what life is about? And not really caring what “life is about” because it’s still exciting enough to keep me busy without asking anymore stupid questions?