I wrote a huge post about these events before. But there are a couple of very important elements that I forgot to mention.
1. Church is retarded! What is with the stand up, sit down, on your knees, stand up, sit down, sing this song, “and also with you,” stand up, say this prayer, on your knees. It was fucking obnoxious! I have knee problems sometimes, and those bastards were not helping. The entire time in church, I was humming this song in my head:
2.Today, later this afternoon, I got the wrap-up report on my drunkenness. Apparently, I am a fucking leprechaun. My aunt told me that my version of playing hide-and-seek, was hopping around in the driveway with a huge grin on my face. Standing behind a car and slurring, “I am hiding. I’m an awesome hider.” It seems that no one else thinks I’m an awesome hider. Whatever. I know the truth.
3. This part is unrelated. But. On Long Island, there are always hot-dog trucks parked near the cemetary. Always been that way. Today, (and I’m not even gonna talk about the sad parts) I went to visit my grandparents in the graveyard. Anyway. There was the hot dog truck. But parked next to it was a stretch limo. And a cop car. And it all struck me funny. It was like some divine ode to Long Island cheesiness. Prom queens. Or a new bride. Stopping for a hot dog on the way to somewhere swanky. And a self-important police officer standing there trying to shoot the breeze about life on the beat. I don’t know. No. This is not the kind of thing anyone cares/thinks about. But I laughed. I guffawed, chortled even. Did not stop for any hot dogs.
And here is another highly relevant video/song for you to enjoy while digesting my bullshit: